Grief is both personal and systemic. As a trans woman, I grieve not just lost jobs or failing bodies, but the political violence that makes my existence feel like an act of resistance. But we must name this: grief is not a burden we all carry the same way. Some bodies cannot move freely, and the expectation of movement can be a form of violence. Grief does not require action—it demands we honor our capacity, whatever that looks like.
Writing letters I’ll never send has helped me, but that’s not the only way. Sometimes, just sitting with a comfort show, grieving fictional characters, is enough. Listening to jazz, or simply breathing, can be a radical act of survival. But let’s be clear: grief isn’t just what we feel—it’s what we’ve been denied. The loss of a world that should have been safer, kinder, more just.
These are personal ways I’ve coped, and research shows that writing, art, even mindful rest, can help. But grief is not a solo journey, and none of us should carry it alone. If you are struggling, you deserve support.
(Disclaimer: These methods are personal, not medical advice. If you need help, reach out. You can call the National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). You are not alone, and you deserve care.)
-Gemma Flora Ortwerth
Gemma Ortwerth 
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